The End
by DetectiveInspectorSydney
Summary: Lily is reminded of her broken friendship with Severus Snape.


**A/N: Prompt: "You Light Up My Life" Debby Boone**

 **Additional Prompts:**

 **2) (word) blend**

 **5) (quote) A lot of people I know believe in positive thinking, and so do I. I believe everything positively stinks."- Lew Col**

 **14) (word) remote**

 **This fic is roughly 900 words.**

"...And you light up my life!" Lily slammed the door to her bedroom as her sister's music blared from the radio across the landing. As the song continued a blend of fear, anger, heartbreak welled inside her chest.

The fear came with the unknown. A year later and she still felt his loss. The anger was almost ever present, mostly at him, but some at herself for feeling this way. The heartbreak was continuous. She's mend herself, only to have something remind her of him that would re-shatter the ceramic pieces.

She'd gone back to the playground today. It had been pretty out, and she needed to get out of the house. And on the way home, she'd walked past his street. Of course she probably hadn't actually seen him, but she could've sworn….

If she were honest with herself, he was the reason she went back to the playground. She wanted to relive the old memories. She wanted to remember a happier time. She wanted that back! She wanted him back.

He'd said something to her once, and she'd laughed at it then, but now it was coming back to haunt her; "A lot of people I know believe in positive thinking, and so do I. I believe everything positively stinks." 17 year old Lily Potter might have used slightly stronger words nowadays, but the sentiment was the same.

She missed him so badly. Over a year later, and the ache had lessened, but the wound had not healed. He had been her best friend. He had been more than her best friend, really. She had never connected to someone on such a visceral a level. They finished each other's sentences, they knew what the other was thinking. Sometimes Severus would try to say something, and it would come out stuttering and confused. Others might have tilted their heads in confusion, but Lily always, always, always knew what he was trying to say. And she didn't made. She didn't mind his greasy hair, his unkempt clothes, or the way he smelled when he was too depressed to take a shower for a few days. She overlooked all of that in favor of the way he made her feel. No one could make her laugh like that. No one made her feel that loved and appreciated. No one made her feel like she was a real, valid person the way Severus had.

But none of that matter now. Because he had lied to her. He had lied to her, and to himself, about who he was and what he wanted. In the end he had decided she wasn't as important as whatever his Death Eater cronies could give him.

Walking past Spinner's End had hurt so badly, she doesn't know how she made it home in one piece. On the outside she was sure she looked and sounded fine. She walked normally, but felt like she was crawling up the stairs. The song was so loud. She didn't have the energy to scream at Petunia to turn it off. Not that Petunia would have cared. If anything, knowing that Lily wanted it turned down probably would have made her turn it up even louder.

He had lit up her life. He had introduced her to the magical world. He'd stayed by her side when her sister, the person she was closest to in the world, decided to throw her out like rotting food. He had always been there for her, until he wasn't.

She supposed it had been a long time coming. The older Slytherins were dragging him further and further away by the day. There several times she could point to in hindsight where she should have called it quits, but she loved him too much to leave him. Even if it was for her good.

Still, to have him throw that in her face the way he did. Any time she thought about it, the whole day came rushing back to her and all of those emotions returned. She often wondered if she should have seen it coming, but how on Earth could she have prepared herself for _that._ Maybe a private standoff, but to denounce, with a slur, in public. She had thought that she meant more to him than that; was worth more respect to him than that, but she had been wrong. His words still rang in her head, a full-on denial of whatever they had meant to each other previously.

His apology hadn't mattered. By then it had started to sink in, and she really wished she had kicked him, as he was already groveling. So what if he meant that he was sorry. Was that supposed to erase the explosion he'd just set off for her. What had their friendship meant, what purpose had the last five years been if this was the end result?

So it had been a whole year. She supposed being able to actually leave the house and walk around Cokeworth was something. Last summer she had hardly left her bedroom.

"You give me hope to carry on…" she wished there was some way to get that stupid radio to turn the fuck off. And then she remembered. She was seventeen now. With a flick of her wand, the music ceased. She could hear Petunia's startled cry, but she ignored it. Then she walked downstairs, grabbed the remote control, turned on the TV, and watched Star Trek.


End file.
